SupaChan's Words

It's me! Two days in a row?!? Don't get used to it ;). Baby steps, one day at a time. Not just regarding my blog, but for life in general.  There is quite a bit of turmoil, hypocrisy, vengeful behaviors and just unkindness happening in my country right now and me being, well me... it's so challenging to deal with. It's so hard for me to be positive, and be a good example to others, and honestly to just keep my mouth shut because I don't want to say something to someone that I'll regret later. So, in addition to avoiding FB like the plague, I literally have to focus on not just one day at a time, but one moment at a time. And to think I thought 2020 was bad??! But enough of that... I'm in a good mood right now! Tomorrow marks my 20 year anniversary at my current employer. How crazy is that??! So much of my life has occurred while working there. Got married, had kids, bought a couple of houses, a few pets, my oldest graduated high school, my husband has had a ...

Nothing special today, just wanted to share I quote I came across. It really resonated with me and I hope it does with you as well. Courage is nine-tenths context.  What is courageous in one setting can be foolhardy in another and even cowardly in a third.  ~Joseph Epstein

Life was so much easier when I was young. The friend I was reconnecting with turned out to be a deceiver and caused so much unwanted drama and hurt feelings in my life and in their own. Granted, I'm not innocent of wrongdoing, but I should not have trusted this old friend. Ya know, I have this problem quite often. Why am I so trusting? Why? The end result is someone's feelings getting hurt. Usually mine, but sometimes other peoples as well. So what do I do? Do I continue to be the kind, trusting creature I am, or do I change? Do I build an impenetrable wall around myself and my heart? It is a good time to start making resolutions being a new year and all. I just don't know. I don't think I can wall myself up, deny my nature and true self... Definitely, have some things I gotta work on though. Number one is to focus on the people I love and the ones who love me. It's much easier on my heart and on theirs that way. I have some other ideas.. overall I just want to ...

Went to see Star Wars, The Last Jedi a couple of times over the weekend... It was good. I liked it. There were a couple of parts that were just meh, but overall it was a good movie and I'll probably go another couple times at least. Got some 'hanging out with parents' time in which was nice. It's kind of challenging and sad hanging out with my dad. He has something called normal pressure hydrocephalus (NPH) and one of the symptoms is dementia... basically, he asks the same questions over and over again. It's definitely a test of patience. After they leave or I leave or whatever it looks like he calls me, to thank me. Then 5 min later, he calls again, to thank me. And then 5 min later, he calls again, to thank me.. you get the idea. It's really hard because he was such a strong powerful man. Seeing him 100% reliable on others...it makes my heart saddened. Just a bit.

I woke up in the best-est mood today!! First - Star Wars. YAHOO!!! I'm going to be seeing it in a few hours and I can hardly wait... OMG!  Second - Recently (within the past couple of weeks) an old friend, like from high school called me and it's been so enjoyable catching up, and reminiscing, and all that jazz. Sending a special shout-out to them for doing that! I'm so happy we're becoming friends again! Third - And this is a little bit older news (1st of November-ish), I bought a new car! YAY! She's sooooo purrrrty! Right?? Lastly - I met a new friend and just think they are completely and totally amazing and I'm so glad we met! You so totally rock! 

Well good morning to you!!  Just a quick update regarding the exam I took last week... yea, I failed. BUT, I am still claiming it as a win. I have taken the exam 3 times now and have gotten progressively better each time. 1st time, good ol' 53 %, 2nd 62.5%, and this last time, 66%!  Just have to study a little bit harder and the exam is in the bag! Thanks for the good vibes though, it's much appreciated. Now, on an unrelated note, I LOVE MY INSTANT POT!!! I can't say it enough!!! It's hands down the best kitchen appliance (?), tool (?), thingy I've EVER purchased. Get one!!!

It is with a saddened, heavy heart I make a post today. Last night I had such a hard time falling asleep and then staying asleep. It wasn't until late this afternoon that I realized it may have been because of the tragedy taking place or about to take place in Las Vegas. I can't even understand why anyone would ever harm anyone, let alone mass amounts of innocent people. My heart aches for the families and friends who lost loved ones. My deepest sympathies to their loved ones. My message today is simple, hug your family, hug your friends, hug all of those you love and care for. You never know when it will be your last moment together, your last chance to tell them how much they mean to you, how much you love them, how glad you are that they are a part of your life, and whatever else you feel you should share. ~~~QOTD~~~ I still find each day too short for all the thoughts I want to think, all the walks I want to take, all the books I want to read, and all the friends I ...

I had the pleasure of finding a radio station recently which plays nothing but New Wave music! OMG, right? Today I chose to listen to said station on my way to work.. it was fantastic!! Can you even imagine the amount flashbacks to good times I had??! Message in a Bottle - YES! Alphaville - Forever Young - MORE YES!! I'm so excited to have finally found a way to improve my commute. It's not that I don't love driving - I do. I don't like other people's driving!

8/31/16 was the date I saw him! I wrote this a couple days after a true experience, after seeing someone that I used to love (I'll call him A). Dear A, I hadn’t/haven’t thought about you in months, and then all of sudden, BAM there you were. In the flesh, I saw you for real today. You walked right past me, twice! Your name suspended on the tip of my tongue, I wanted to call out to you, I wanted to, more than anything. It took every ounce of my willpower to remain quiet and not say your name. You would've  heard me even if I didn’t yell. You were that close to me. I thought for sure the pounding of my heart would give me away.  I wanted to lean forward and whisper your name. Perhaps I should have. I wanted you to turn towards the sound and smile when you saw it was me, for real. To see me in the flesh, within an arm’s reach of you. To watch your eyes light up as you recognized me. I wanted to go to you, to hug you, and to kiss you. I wanted to show you how sorry I was. For...

It's my experience that when I am NOT being true to myself, or when I am trying to be/act like someone else for any reason, I feel different. I mean I experience a physical change. On the other side of that coin, when I am being myself, embracing all that is me, I feel incredible! Unstoppable! It is truly the greatest feeling. Makes me wonder, why then do I sometimes choose to not act like or be myself? I'm sure everyone experiences this or something similar. The hard part is recognizing it.... I leave you with this quote I really enjoyed. ~Every time you don't follow your inner guidance, you feel a loss of energy, loss of power, a sense of spiritual deadness. ~Shakti Gawain

Men in general judge more from appearances than from reality. All men have eyes, but few have the gift of penetration. ~Niccolo Machiavelli I think this is a great reminder to all of us. Do not judge. I know it's hard. Sometimes it seems to just happen like you didn't mean to, but you still did. Completely unconsciously, or sub-consciously. For some of us, this may even be a daily struggle, or many times a day struggle. I do my best to not judge, to accept people for WHO they are and not for what they do. Sometimes this is an easy goal I've set up on myself, other times it feels damn near impossible. The important thing is I don't give up. I continue to strive to BE the best version of myself. To me, this includes not judging others, and being kind - as often as possible, most of all to BE love.

To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting. ~e.e. cummings This is so true. I look at myself, my family, my friends, other people and wonder, are we being true to ourselves? Are we genuine? If we're not, why not? Why do we ever feel a need to be, act, or say something just because somebody else told us to be a certain way, or act on something against our true selves wishes and desires? Today and every day moving forward I am making a conscious effort to only be me! To listen to that inner knowing (because it's always right), to be, act, and say things that are true to myself. Because in the end, that's all there really is anyway.