SupaChan's Words

It's me! Two days in a row?!? Don't get used to it ;). Baby steps, one day at a time. Not just regarding my blog, but for life in general.  There is quite a bit of turmoil, hypocrisy, vengeful behaviors and just unkindness happening in my country right now and me being, well me... it's so challenging to deal with. It's so hard for me to be positive, and be a good example to others, and honestly to just keep my mouth shut because I don't want to say something to someone that I'll regret later. So, in addition to avoiding FB like the plague, I literally have to focus on not just one day at a time, but one moment at a time. And to think I thought 2020 was bad??! But enough of that... I'm in a good mood right now! Tomorrow marks my 20 year anniversary at my current employer. How crazy is that??! So much of my life has occurred while working there. Got married, had kids, bought a couple of houses, a few pets, my oldest graduated high school, my husband has had a ...

Nothing special today, just wanted to share I quote I came across. It really resonated with me and I hope it does with you as well. Courage is nine-tenths context.  What is courageous in one setting can be foolhardy in another and even cowardly in a third.  ~Joseph Epstein

At the beginning of this year it dawned on me that I haven't/hadn't been reading as much as I used to and I didn't know why. I told myself, it was because 'I didn't have time'. Which I knew was a lie. A small insignificant and minor lie and only to myself, but still... I remembered how much I LOVE reading and was disappointed in myself. I decided then that I was going to read. I started out with a small goal. A goal I knew I could easily obtain. Read 6 books this year. Just 6. Then I'll be back in the habit of reading and could read more next year. I'm happy to say/report that as of today, I've read 30 books!! And updated my goal to 45! The time was there all along, I was just wasting it on other things. Pick up a book, read it, pick up another, read it, and repeat. :D

Life is really full of ups and downs. Everything will be going great, then all of a sudden BAM!! WTF was that? Am I right? I suppose it's just the universe's way of presenting opportunities. Then based on our action/reaction we have either a positive or a negative experience. I mean, I understand this concept and such, I just don't like when the result is such a downer.

Life was so much easier when I was young. The friend I was reconnecting with turned out to be a deceiver and caused so much unwanted drama and hurt feelings in my life and in their own. Granted, I'm not innocent of wrongdoing, but I should not have trusted this old friend. Ya know, I have this problem quite often. Why am I so trusting? Why? The end result is someone's feelings getting hurt. Usually mine, but sometimes other peoples as well. So what do I do? Do I continue to be the kind, trusting creature I am, or do I change? Do I build an impenetrable wall around myself and my heart? It is a good time to start making resolutions being a new year and all. I just don't know. I don't think I can wall myself up, deny my nature and true self... Definitely, have some things I gotta work on though. Number one is to focus on the people I love and the ones who love me. It's much easier on my heart and on theirs that way. I have some other ideas.. overall I just want to ...

I'm feeling much better than I was when I last posted. That was definitely the roughest day I've had in a long time. To my one follower, thank you for caring. :) QOTD: The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn. ~David Russell

Today I'm struggling with staying focused. I keep thinking about things from the past. Moments when someone I really care about said really cruel things about me to me. All this time I thought I'd forgiven them, but I don't think I have. I just can't let it go. Should I? The things said to me were truly damaging and hurt me, all the way to my core. I have tried to forgive and forget, but I honestly don't think I can. Some of these things were said to me years ago, like 5 or more. I want to forgive them, but I don't want to forget. Is that wrong of me? What do you do when someone intentionally (yes, intentionally - they admitted to that later) damages your self-esteem and self-worth? Do you forgive them? Do you forget it happened? Do you forgive AND forget? I'm really having a hard time w/this one peeps.

It is with a saddened, heavy heart I make a post today. Last night I had such a hard time falling asleep and then staying asleep. It wasn't until late this afternoon that I realized it may have been because of the tragedy taking place or about to take place in Las Vegas. I can't even understand why anyone would ever harm anyone, let alone mass amounts of innocent people. My heart aches for the families and friends who lost loved ones. My deepest sympathies to their loved ones. My message today is simple, hug your family, hug your friends, hug all of those you love and care for. You never know when it will be your last moment together, your last chance to tell them how much they mean to you, how much you love them, how glad you are that they are a part of your life, and whatever else you feel you should share. ~~~QOTD~~~ I still find each day too short for all the thoughts I want to think, all the walks I want to take, all the books I want to read, and all the friends I ...

I've had a few amazing dreams since last time I posted, but I will leave it that seeing as how they are NSFW if you know what I'm saying... 👿 ~~ My so-called real life has been pretty amazing lately. I've been able to really connect with one of my friends and am feeling very happy as a result. It's so nice to have someone I can talk about anything with and be myself around. Thank you C! ~~ One true friend adds more to our happiness than a thousand enemies add to our unhappiness. ~Marie Dubsky, Freifrau von Ebner-Eschenbach

I really am feeling very appreciative of friends today. I found the following 2 quotes that mirror my thoughts.  Today's post is dedicated to my friends. I love you all. As the song says "thank you for being a friend." I'm looking forward to many more amazing and wonderful experiences with my friends. -- When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather, to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares. ~Henri Nouwen --- A healing friend is a kindred spirit who says "yeah, I know what you mean!" while pouring your cup of tea; sees your uniqueness; c...

During this past summer, we went to some fancy gardens. Being a lover of photography, I, of course, ended up with lots and lots of pics! I really loved this one and had an urge to share it with you. Please take a moment and enjoy this moment.

I had the pleasure of finding a radio station recently which plays nothing but New Wave music! OMG, right? Today I chose to listen to said station on my way to work.. it was fantastic!! Can you even imagine the amount flashbacks to good times I had??! Message in a Bottle - YES! Alphaville - Forever Young - MORE YES!! I'm so excited to have finally found a way to improve my commute. It's not that I don't love driving - I do. I don't like other people's driving!

8/31/16 was the date I saw him! I wrote this a couple days after a true experience, after seeing someone that I used to love (I'll call him A). Dear A, I hadn’t/haven’t thought about you in months, and then all of sudden, BAM there you were. In the flesh, I saw you for real today. You walked right past me, twice! Your name suspended on the tip of my tongue, I wanted to call out to you, I wanted to, more than anything. It took every ounce of my willpower to remain quiet and not say your name. You would've  heard me even if I didn’t yell. You were that close to me. I thought for sure the pounding of my heart would give me away.  I wanted to lean forward and whisper your name. Perhaps I should have. I wanted you to turn towards the sound and smile when you saw it was me, for real. To see me in the flesh, within an arm’s reach of you. To watch your eyes light up as you recognized me. I wanted to go to you, to hug you, and to kiss you. I wanted to show you how sorry I was. For...

Appearances are not held to be a clue to the truth. But we seem to have no other. ~Ivy Compton-Burnett

Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint at it that you can. ~Danny Kaye

It's my experience that when I am NOT being true to myself, or when I am trying to be/act like someone else for any reason, I feel different. I mean I experience a physical change. On the other side of that coin, when I am being myself, embracing all that is me, I feel incredible! Unstoppable! It is truly the greatest feeling. Makes me wonder, why then do I sometimes choose to not act like or be myself? I'm sure everyone experiences this or something similar. The hard part is recognizing it.... I leave you with this quote I really enjoyed. ~Every time you don't follow your inner guidance, you feel a loss of energy, loss of power, a sense of spiritual deadness. ~Shakti Gawain

A daydream is a meal at which images are eaten. Some of us are gourmets, some gourmands, and a good many take their images precooked out of a can and swallow them down whole, absent-mindedly and with little relish. ~W.H. Auden

To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting. ~e.e. cummings This is so true. I look at myself, my family, my friends, other people and wonder, are we being true to ourselves? Are we genuine? If we're not, why not? Why do we ever feel a need to be, act, or say something just because somebody else told us to be a certain way, or act on something against our true selves wishes and desires? Today and every day moving forward I am making a conscious effort to only be me! To listen to that inner knowing (because it's always right), to be, act, and say things that are true to myself. Because in the end, that's all there really is anyway.